Boris runs away and returns...

Whew! That was a long vacation!

Sorry about the long delay in my blog my faithful readers, all three of you. I've been absolutely swamped at work.

Here's a story about our cat, Boris, running away...


Boris runs away...

I've written about our newest cat, Boris, the one that's really lazy, that belches, that has chin acne, that isn't that bright, that is a bed hog and so on. Actually, I only wrote that he's quite lazy, but add the other stuff to that.

Boris lived on the streets for months before being picked up by the Humane Society. When we got him, he'd shown some interest in going outside, but we didn't want to start that habit. Our old cat, Moe, used to go outside on a leash in the front yard, so we tried that with Boris. He enjoyed it so much that he'd throw a hissy fit if he didn't get to go outside.

At first, he'd walk around and occasionally get wrapped around our tree in the middle of the front yard. Then he started to get more and more adventurous that he started chasing bugs, which usually congregated by the rose bushes right next to the house. I would come outside and find him wrapped in figure eights in the shrubbery. I'd have to unclip him and untangle the rope once or twice a day. It started to get old.

One day, I came out to get him and I found the rope frayed with no collar or Boris attached.

Panicked, I ran around the corner of the house and found him halfway to the back yard. I grabbed him and threw him inside while I tried to fix the rope. It was at least 10 years old and very weather frayed. I got it tied, but knew I had to replace it with a chain, which I did when I got a dog chain at the pet store. It's the kind that's steel encased in plastic with metal clips on each end.

I was pretty satisfied with this setup for a while because it didn't snag on the shrubbery like the rope did.

I should say that I WAS satisfied with this setup until the other night when I walked out to retrievehim. I followed the rope in the shrubbery to the end clip and found no Boris. He must have tugged on the end and it had enough give that he was able to pull himself off the clip.

I ran to the backyard and found no trace of him. I ran around our house a couple of times. No Boris. I got a flashlight and walked around calling his name. No dice. I got in my car and slowly drove up each street looking for flashes of him, but he was gone.

I broke the news to Laura that her replacement cat for Moe was missing and she took it pretty bad. She had just gotten over Moe and now this new cat disappears. In the morning, Julia broke down crying because she was so worried. I stayed home and put out fliers and drove around the neighborhood a few more times, but still found no sign of him.

I tried to cheer Laura and Julia up by telling them that I had a cat that had ran away when I was in college. In the same scenario, she had gotten outside and didn't came back. I walked around for a couple days all depressed because I didn't think she was coming back, but then late on the second night of her being gone, she showed up all dirty and hungry. I still had a little hope that he was going to return like my old cat had, but it was obvious that Laura had given up hope. I think the fact that she said, "I don't think he's coming back," several times led me to this point.

That second night here came and Laura got more depressed. She had just gone to bed when the doorbell ran.

There on the front porch was our neighbor and he had a struggling Boris in his arms. Apparently, he had found Boris walking around their back yard.

So all's well that ends well, right? Well, there is a small funny footnote to this.

The next night, Julia and I went out to eat while Laura was away at a bachelorette party. My phone rang. I checked the number. It said 'Private."

I answered it.

"Did you put up signs that you lost your cat?" the called asked, referring to my Lost Cat signs that I had taped up all over our subdivision.

"Yes, I did. But he came back last night. I need to take those signs down. Sorry about that."

The caller continued, "Is there a reward?"

"Ummm... No. He came back last night."

The caller hung up. I shrugged and hung up.

I started to wonder what that was all about. Who calls up someone before they found their lost pet asking if they are looking for that pet?

Maybe I was going to come home and find that he had been stolen. In his place would be a random note asking for his reward.

Maybe he's a wanted cat and a bounty hunter was distracting me while he broke in and took Boris.

He was still there, but it still strikes me as weird. Finding a cat and calling someone if it's theirs I can understand, but to call before finding said cat?

The kid sounded like a teenager, so I started to picture a kid like Encyclopedia Brown, a young amateur detective profiled in a book series of the same name. The kid must have been walking around the neighborhood with his trusty side kicks. They see my sign and jot down my number. This probably sounds like the perfect case for them. They probably called it "The Case of the Missing Cat." He calls me up and I hire him to find my cat. He does some searching around, but ends up finding nothing. Then a break in the case! He realizes that there is a secret cat stealing operation with the criminals sending the cats overseas for some secret laboratory experiments. He'll get caught while trying to save Boris, but get away through his ingenious McGuyver-cunning in which he cuts through his binds by using his glasses as a magnifying glass to harness the sun's power to cut through the ropes. He'll get the cops to come, the day will be solved and I'll get my cat back. But because I had already found him, he won't have that chance. Shame...